the very same

don't you just love re-discovering old songs
old being a relative word a lot of the time
meaning, songs that once were your 'go-to' song
songs that played over and over in your head
songs that you would hum as you fell asleep
songs with words that you would pray when you couldn't find your own words
songs that spoke very clearly to a place you were at in life
that kind of song.

i very clearly remember when michael and i picked out the worship songs for our wedding
i had a "free drink" voucher for starbucks, so, in true mennonite style, we went and got the worlds biggest *free* caramel frappucino with a huge dollop of whip cream and caramel drizzle
it was august and the air was perfectly warm
we sat out on the patio, sipping our drink and chatting about our wedding coming up
i had made a huge list of worship songs that we just loved
and slowly we made our list smaller
we were each allowed to cross off songs on the list, one at a time, taking turns
eventually we had it narrowed down to our songs
the love of god
resonate
be unto your name

be unto your name was such a fitting song for us
we were still very much in the freshness of a grief we never knew possible.
getting married only 2 months after Jay's birth and death was such a hard thing
it was SO obvious to me that we weren't complete as a family, he was very much missing
but in the same way, we were closer as a family than we had ever been.
my faith was shaken, but it was also stronger in a way
such extremes in so many ways
i wanted my wedding day to be focused on Jesus. because i knew that He would be the only constant. things would happen that would make us more in love, or that would shake us to the very core. things would happen where we didn't know what to do, except turn to Jesus. our wedding was a moment. Jesus is forever! we ARE broken, but oh, HE is the healer.
words that i couldn't have put together better myself.

i feel like i just re-discovered this song today, and it continues to speak into my life in very strong ways. to the very same hurts and grief. to the very same love. to the very same brokeness. to the same need. the same Jesus!

we are a moment, You are forever
Lord of the ages
God before time.
we are a vapor
You are eternal
love everlasting, reigning on high

holy holy Lord God Almighty
worthy is the Lamb who was slain;
highest praises, honor and glory
be unto Your name,
be unto Your name

we are the broken, You are the healer
Jesus, Redeemer! mighty to save
You are the love song we'll sing forever
bowing before you, blessing Your name