and now i find myself with a couple of hours to kill in the toronto airport, so i will finally update.
once again, i have found myself in a very busy & full life
i am just returning from a mini-vaction of sorts
i flew to toronto on wednesday and spent a few days with jo, then picked up cheryl in hamilton and spent the next couple of days with her and adrienne. last night we had the privilege of witnessing our dear friend, Lauren, exchange vows with her love!
the service brought me right back to my wedding day, and the bittersweet-ness of it
don't get me wrong, my day was so sweet. so wonderful and dreamlike and near perfection
but the entire day, i was missing Jay - and i knew that the day would have only been better had he been there. such grief amid a very happy day.
Lauren lost her mom this past winter, and i couldn't help but imagine Marilyn soaking it all in the entire day. watching the sparkle of lauren's dress in the sunlight, the twinkle in her eyes as she spoke to Gary
the smell of her flowers (her mom's favorite ones) or the way Marilyn's jewelery fell perfectly around Lauren's neck. the savory meal and the taste of the many desserts at the buffet as they would have rolled over her tongue. i imagined the way she would have watched Lauren and the way she would have walked together with her husband.
tears rolled down my cheeks as i listened to her Dad share words written by her mom a few years ago, and as he spoke with such love for their daughter, my dear friend!
he was, as Lauren put it, the perfect mother of the bride & an even better father of the bride
bitter-bitter-sweet.
some things just do not make sense to us - cancer being one of those things.
while being away this week, i have missed sitting beside my grandma's bed, chatting with her as the cancer is over taking her body, but not her spirit.
she has the same sparkle in her eyes, and the same sweet laughter.
the other day i sat by her bed and sang over her, and together we lifted our eyes and hearts heavenward. she nodded along as i sang
tis so sweet to trust in Jesus
just to take him at his word
just to rest upon his promise
and to know, "thus saith the Lord"
Jesus Jesus - how I trust him!
how I've proved him over & o'er
Jesus Jesus - precious Jesus
oh for grace to trust him more
Oh, how sweet to trust in Jesus
just to trust his cleansing blood
and in simple faith to plunge me
'neath the healing, cleansing flood
Yes, 'tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
just from sin and self to cease;
just from Jesus simply taking
Life & rest, and joy & peace
I'm so glad I learned to trust You.
Precious Jesus, Savior - friend.
and I know that You are with me
will be with me to the end
Jesus Jesus - how we trust you!
How we've proved you over & o'er
Jesus Jesus - precious Jesus
Oh for grace to trust You more...
trusting Jesus makes the bittersweet sweeter.
