gratefulness

it has been a long time since I have posted anything

I realize that it's a combination of things - partially not knowing exactly what to write about, partially feeling too passionate about things to write about (and I don't like to write about something if I'm too emotional about it, because I find that I can regret things that I write in such a public forum), and partially because I am using my time differently. Life with an 18 month old is a busy one! And in this day and age, technology is everywhere. Matilda knows what my phone sounds like when I get a text, she knows what it means if it starts ringing, she knows how to slide her finger on the screen to unlock it, and she knows how to scroll thru pictures and press PLAY on videos. Sometimes it's cute and sometimes it's eery, to see how someone so little can do all these things, and realizing its because she is watching it all around her! But, all that to say, I cannot as easily be on the computer with her around, nor do I want to be as much.

But right now, she is fast asleep in her room, and I am taking some moments to myself to write about some thoughts that have been milling around in my head for the last couple of weeks.

I have been thinking a lot about the idea of gratefulness - and how quickly gratefulness can be replaced with entitlement, jealousy, pride etc. Two quotes that have been in my head lately have been "remember this - that very little is needed to make a happy life" (aurelis) and "comparison is the thief of joy" (theodore roosevelt). I have been thinking about how happy life can be, how content I am at home with Matilda, playing and learning, reading, drawing etc. and then one conversation with someone else (particularly another mom) can leave me thinking that I want the things that she has, or maybe my parenting isn't as good because my kid wakes up earlier than hers, or she makes it to the gym and I don't, or her kid is saying 30 words etc etc. So quickly the comparison can change a perspective from grateful to jealous. Or how quickly I can leave a conversation on the opposite end, thinking to myself how superior my parenting is because of this or that. And my gratefulness is swapped for a much uglier pride and entitlement.

This was all really put into perspective for me last night. My husband had an early start to work yesterday, as well as a later stop time. He left before Matilda woke up, and normally he gets up with her and they spend the morning together until he has to leave (giving me the luxury of catching a few more zzz's). So my day started earlier than normal. The day was lovely, with different visits from different loved ones. Matilda had a nice long nap and I was productive during those couple of hours. But then the time that I expected Michael to come home, came and went. I couldn't get him on the phone and I started growing impatient. Only later in the evening did I realize that it was more like a spoiled kid, grumbling that they were home alone, when the other person would have loved to be home but was instead working hard and making money! He came home and quickly I felt discouraged by the idea of trying to make something for supper, no ideas, nothing quick to make etc etc. We put Matilda down together and went downstairs to start supper. However, unlike every other night, Matilda decided she didn't want to sleep. She was crying and fussing, and that is just not her style. So I went in to try and help her, but that made it worse when I tried leaving. So, back up I went, thinking "poor me". We gave her some Tylenol to help with the molars that are trying to come through and I sat in the rocking chair. She fussed for a little while, but as I was singing, she very quickly settled and just snuggled in. I moved her into a cradle hold position, and sat there singing to her, songs of Jesus loving her, God making nature, God's power and might. Her eyes were closed and she was in a steady soft breathing pattern that showed her relaxing more every minute. I sat there, and God brought to mind so many things. In the past few weeks I have learned of 2 little boys each passing away (neither who I knew personally, but I did read from both mom's blogs etc) one from a sudden car accident (he was 3), and another from a brain tumor (he was 5). God also brought to mind two different names of women I love who are trying to start families. He reminded me of a conversation I had with another friend who is potentially going to have to move away from close family for work circumstances. I was sitting there, holding my sweet sleeping baby, and was so aware of those who are with empty arms and life was put into perspective. My gratefulness was looking more like entitlement, and with entitlement came the idea that I could complain about mundane things, or feel sorry for myself about things that are not big things at all. I was thinking about the one mom, who would be at home without her little 5 year old - who she sang to every night, and I was overwhelmed with gratefulness that I could be sitting here holding my baby and singing to her.

So I sat there a little longer. Rocked her a little more. Sang her one more song. Said many silent thank you prayers. Whispered I love you. Gave her a kiss and savoured the moment of looking at her, and tried to remind myself not to forget this moment, but to use it to live daily with gratefulness.

Emmanuel

It's Christmas morning and here I sit. Awake in a quiet house. My sweet girl is still fast asleep and I think to myself that this will be one of the - if not the, last times I wake up before heron Christmas morning. This year she is intrigued by the pretty lights, the peppermint and gingerbread cookies, the music we dance and sing to, and the mistletoe that we kiss her daddy goodbye and hello under. She is excited to see all the family and to rip up some tissue paper. 

She has no idea about Santa, or the fact that I have been trying to decide how we will present the "Santa twist"to Christmas. I do hope, however, that already her mind and heart are soaking in the things she hears and sees- the advent readings, the bible stories, the talk and excitement about the real true meaning behind this season. That she will grow up knowing that we give gifts not because they are deserved, not because you spent the year being "nice", and not because some man in red some how squeezed into our home thru the fireplace (which will be a predicament for ol' st. Nick since our new fireplace will be gas and the glass won't open...) But because of the sacrifice, the love, and the grace we received from the best gift of all, thr birth of Jesus. 

We were part of a worship team a couple weeks ago and one of the songs we sang that morning was Emmanuel (Hallowed Manger Ground) by Chris Tomlin. One of the lines stuck out to me during practice and I have continued to let that line move thru my thoughts about Christmas and how we make this time gift of Jesus something we acknowledge and celebrate all year. The line was: The son of God, here born to bleed... Every year I view Christmas and the gift it represents, through the lens of whatever I am currently going thru or whatever stage of life I'm at. This year, celebrating with my daughter who is 13 months old - so much a toddler, yet still so much my baby - this line feels a bit like a punch in the gut. I imagine Mary, given this gift - knowing that her "soul will be pierced" (Luke 2:35), looking down at this baby with such love, and such pain at the same time. And then thinking about God - and how He knew the whole plan, what would happen and the pain that He was knowingly sending Jesus into, as a sacrifice and gift to us - that just makes me more aware of the enormity of this gift. This grace. This love that we did nothing to deserve. How can we not live in thankfulness every day?

So here I sit on this Christmas morning, never alone, and thanking God for this gift - 

Emmanuel, Emmanuel

God incarnate, here to dwell

Emmanuel, Emmanuel

Praise His name Emmanuel

And we beheld this offering

Exalted now the King of kings

Praise God for the hallowed manger ground. 

Matthew 1:21 (Message) Mary’s pregnancy is Spirit-conceived. God’s Holy Spirit has made her pregnant. She will bring a son to birth, and when she does, you, Joseph, will name him Jesus—‘God saves’—because he will save his people from their sins.

eleven months!

I can hardly believe that in less than one month, my little babe will be turning ONE.

It feels like just yesterday I found out I was pregnant (and this week I found my pregnancy test in a box of stuff I had packed when we moved. When I found it Matilda walked up to where I was standing and I looked at her and said, "this is YOU!" Such a happy moment of my life is reflected in that little "stick"  For those of you who think it's gross that I still have that - I will have you know that the part you pee on is all capped off, and I peed into a cup so as not to pee all over the stick - so you can rest assured it is clean. Plus I'm not going to ask you to hold it!)

I'm already planning her party, and she is acting more and more like a toddler every day. The biggest thing being when she learned how to walk this past month. She is no longer a helpless little baby. She is a little toddling sweetheart that loves to make me laugh but will also throw a little feet stomping party when I take away the tampons that she thinks are THE BEST toy around. She has her own little personality, and my dad likes to "joke" that "the woman in her is starting to show up" with her little attitude. Poppa better look out when Matti can fend for herself in the teasing department! :)

It's hard to believe she is getting older, but then you spend an hour or 2 with her, and the amount of talking she does will convince anyone that she is no longer a quiet little newborn. And we are loving every minute of it. There really is nothing sweeter than hearing little feet pitter pattering on the floor and opening my eyes to see her sweet face smiling at me as she stands beside my bed in the morning - ready for a kiss!!

This life really is full of sweetness.

Here is her update!
(Click on the picture to enlarge enough to read the text.)

Double digits!

things are happily busy over here!

So busy that I couldn't sit down to write about my 10 month old until today, when she is now 10 1/2 months old :)

Here is the update on my sweet girl for those of you who follow her on here!!

(click on the photo to enlarge it enough to read)

Life is good, and we are thankful.

and then she was 9..

Months - nine months!!

Today is a beautiful summer day and right now my sweet girl is fast asleep for her afternoon nap.
There are toys everywhere - little signs of where she was playing, walking (assisted walking), eating.
I love these quiet times that I get to myself when she is sleeping, but whenever I get Matilda up from a nap I say to her, "I missed you!!" and it is true! I love my life with my family of 3.

She is pure sweetness. Whenever I go places with her people say to me, "she's so happy!" or "she can't always be this content, is she?" and the answer is YES! She has such a wonderful and sweet disposition. I love every minute with this sweet little critter!

Here is the update on my girl - she turned 9 months last week - time flies!

(click on the image to enlarge it)

Gleem!

This afternoon I was given the opportunity to sit with my mom and sister, drinking coffee and eating cheesecake all while trying on beautiful pieces of jewellery! We were blessed today by Jane, who makes unique pieces of jewellery, by being given some new jewellery for our wardrobe. Each piece is unique and we were all able to find more than one thing that we loved!

Jane sells her jewellery (Gleem Jewellery) on her etsy store (click here to check it out). You can also see pictures of her stuff on her Facebook page. 

Thank you Jane for taking the time to visit with us and to check out Women Refreshed at the Well, and thank you so much for these beautiful gifts of jewellery!!

Here are some of the pieces we chose!

photoshoot at grannys

i love taking pictures of my girl, and she loves, loves LOVES the camera. (and the camera loves her I think!) I put her in this outfit and I thought it was too cute to not take some pictures in it. plus granny has a red chair infront of her deck that I always thought would be a perfect photo prop. Before I knew it I had 2 "assistants" - granny & auntie phoebe. Here are some of my favorites!!

8 months

Another month has come and gone, and my sweet girl is another month older.

Time is flying by!!

We are loving this summer weather, although she and I both don't love the really hot weather as much - but we do love fans and air conditioning *smile*

It is crazy to me that we are closer to the 1 year mark than the day she was born! She is really growing up!

Here is her update, a few weeks late - seems like she is going to be 9 months before I know it.

(click on the image to enlarge it)

5

Hard to believe it has been 5 years. 

Missing him more than ever. 

Happy birthday sweet boy. I love you. 

Love, auntie 

7 things I have realized while raising my sweet 7 month old.

I started this post awhile ago, on June 14, and am just finishing it now, so here it is!

today my beautiful girl is 7 months old!!

So, why not share 7 things I have come to realize...

1. Having a daughter has made me even more content in my own skin. It feels natural to be her mom! Another way I've realized this is that I am totally content at home - I can spend the whole day with just her, and I feel like I have had a wonderful day. And then seeing other people is just a bonus!

2. Having a husband that chooses to be a hands-on-dad is something to be thankful for every single day. Michael loves to spend time with Matilda, and even gets up early to do so!

3. You know you are living a new sleep-deprived reality when you get 4 hours of a sleep in a row and you think to yourself, "wow, that was a treat!!" - thankfully Matilda is now sleeping unswaddled and through the night - this is not something to take for granted or to brag about either! :)

4. I am not a clean person in general - my house is normally some form of cluttered or messy - however, baby food has made me realize that a baby messy with food grosses me out!! Something I read said "put a dollop of the new food onto baby's high chair tray and let them explore it with their fingers." I tried that and the minute it was a big smeary mess and her hands went up to her hair - I was done!! I apologized to her as I was wiping her clean frantically with a cloth... I'm learning some flexibility with this one...

5. It is important to continually encourage her to try and learn new things. She is a quick learner, and I have often wondered if she could have mastered a skill sooner, had I only let her try (example: sitting and sleeping unswaddled). I am excited to help her learn how to crawl but I am also loving the ease of having a stationary baby.

6. Having a baby in the winter was perfect timing - when we didn't need to go out, we didn't even want to - and now that we are going on outings and spending time in the stroller, swings, grass and bike, it is so nice to have the beautiful weather. Mental note - next time get pregnant again mid-winter!

7. I have never loved someone as much as I love Matilda. When I'm not with her I'm looking at pictures or videos of her or at least talking about her. She is her own unique self and she is beautifully content and happy. I am excited to watch her grow up and change but I am loving to just soak her in now. The other day my sister Leah was telling her boys, "sometimes I love to just sit and watch baby Matti!" and I couldn't agree more :)

Here is her update!
(click on the image to enlarge it enough to read the update - the older she gets, the more things there are to write about!!)

6 months

I can hardly believe that it has already been half a year (and more, since I'm late in posting this... again!) since my beautiful girl was born into this world!! I can still remember what her first cry sounded like, and how good and natural it felt to finally hold her, my daughter, in my arms!

the last 6 months have flown by, and I have already started thinking about the fact that in the same amount of time from now - she will be one! So much is changing so quickly, and we are just constantly so thankful for her!

here is her monthly update - as always, click on the image to make it large enough to read everything!
(the picture on the right is michael's favorite picture of Matilda. He loves that her eyes are watering because she was smiling so much!! It definitely represents our sweet girl)

remembering.

I have always been a fan of worship music - no matter how new or how old. I love me a good solid hymn with 4 part harmony (and the occasional "descant" if we want to really get crazy), I love the newest most contemporary styles as well. And really, everything in between! My iPod playlists will often contain a mixture of gaithers to iron & wine. I'm not picky really. One thing I do love, is playing or singing an "old" song (old being a relative term here) and rediscovering it. Either the way the melody ebbs & flows or fits into my favorite register of my voice, or rediscovering the poetic phrases in the lyrics, or a combo of the two if I'm lucky!

I have compiled all of my worship music into one large binder. It contains all kinds of gems in there. And often, just when I need it - I will flip "randomly" to a song, and it will fit exactly where I am at with my thoughts. Today was one of those days. I flipped to the song "We Worship You" by Jane Martens. I have always loved the melody of this song, and today the words fit perfectly into my thoughts, especially the second verse:

We worship You, we come before Your throne
To see Your face Lord, for You have cleansed us
And called us Your own
We worship You and even in pain
We know You've redeemed us
And we'll never be the same

So because of Your grace and Your unfailing love
Because of Your faithfulness we lift You up
Because of Your word and Your righteous ways
We offer to You Lord this sacrifice of praise

I have been thinking a lot about what our lives look like as Christians. How are we supposed to be different, and how are we supposed to be "in the world" as well. These thoughts are largely due to those around me - I have been surrounded by the whole spectrum these days it seems. I have a new friend who is a new Christian - and making this decision has required huge sacrifice. I have others around me that are being very obedient in our call as Christians - which sometimes requires a huge change in our lives and often pushes us out of our comfort zone, or inviting others in, which also challenges our comfort zone. I have also been witness to the other extreme of the spectrum, with those who once were on the same page as me, and have now expanded their "God box" and are walking a dangerous line of interpreting God's word to fit our situation and desires. 

When we are spiritual and earthly peers to one another, we will just naturally compare our experiences to others, our views, our thoughts, our nudgings of the Spirit. So I have been thinking a lot about what do I want my life to be like, how do I want others to see Christ in me, and how do I want Christ to see me every minute of every day. How do I walk along side of a new Christian, and also those who are struggling? 

We have the luxury (and I really do see it as a luxury) of having a huge community of faith around us. We have had the opportunity recently to seek out the council of our spiritual authority in our church (our lead pastor) as well as conversations with peers. We have open communication in our family unit of Michael and I, as well as both of our extended families. We have friends and peers. We have people in our lives who commit to praying for us, while we commit to praying for others. People who encourage us while we use our energies to encourage others. Community, a luxury, and a necessity for spiritual health. 

One of the other opportunities recently for me has been attending a Beth Moore bible study at Women Refreshed at the Well. It is called "Laws of Love" and it is a short study on the book of Deuteronomy. I have been so thankful for this study so far. One of the major parts that has stuck in my mind has been on the point of Spiritual Amnesia. Here are some of the points Beth makes on that (someone on the internet has posted these notes- so it is not verbatim, just the notes of another person doing this bible study):

Deuteronomy 8:2,11,14,18,19:
Spiritual amnesia kills people, churches, integrity, promise.
V2: and you shall remember
V11: take care let you forget
V14: then your heart be lifted up, and you forget
V18: you shall remember
V19: and if you forget
The only way to keep from forgetting is to remember!
Remembering is the key to not forgetting!

My story is my ministry. My story is the reason why I have the sanity to put 4 words together to make sense. All for His glory!

There is a thin line between taking for granted what God has done and taking credit for it. When we stop remembering, we have forgotten; It will bring us back to bondage every time.
We cry out and we start again in hopes to make it right this time. It's an endless cycle. Make it stop.

This has fit so well into my thoughts these days. With both my friend that is a new Christian, and those on the other end - one is in a place of realizing what God is doing - and working so hard at remembering, and the other is in the place of beginning to forget. Through all of it, I am realizing that it is our job as Christians to work at REMEMBERING. To keep God involved and at the centre of everything we do so that our story - the way we live, our life in all aspects - points back to God and what He has done. 

I've been reminded yet again that being a Christian is a verb not a noun (ha, I feel like Dr. Phil here - he always says "now I'm going to put verbs in my sentences"). God is not a box that we can widen - his word is very clear and God needs to be the only thing we measure ourself against. The minute we try to fit God around our sins and earthly tendencies, is the minute that we have started to forget. Being a Christian is work! It requires sacrifice (either materialistic things, or not giving into sinful desires etc). 

And this is where I (finally) fit the song into it all. The last line of the song always hits me. "We offer to You Lord, this sacrifice of praise."The way that we worship God, is by continually offering ourselves to him, all parts - even the parts that we so desperately want to cling to. But when we work at remembering - the sacrifice is put into perspective, and it really is just all about worship & praise and then we realize that this sacrifice is hardly a sacrifice at all once we realize where we are because of God. 

"You were lost sheep with no idea who you were or where you were going. Now you're named and kept for good by the shepherd of your souls." 1 Peter 2:25

5 months!

I can hardly believe it that it has already been 5 months since my favorite person in the world was born!!

Her 5 month collage is a wee bit late since we are busy moving and adjusting to life these days. 

But better late than never!

Again, click on the picture to make it bigger so you can read all about her these days. The measurements are approximate - I attempted to measure her height with a tape measure while she stood on the table, and her weight - well, there was a bit of a mishap with the scale - long story short, the scale may not be stable enough to hold a baby that doesn't just lay still all the time. haha. So.. approximate!

Baby Formula: Perks and tips from a proud formula mom.

I am a formula using mom. Figured I should just get that out there at the start of this post.

When I became pregnant I did a lot of reading, reading about pregnancy, about my baby's development, about infant care, sleeping "techniques", and a lot about breast feeding. I had of course heard the (much overused in my opinion) familiar proclamation that BREAST IS BEST, and found that many of the books that I took out of the library weren't actually so much about breast feeding, but rather loved to do "formula bashing".

I personally felt that breast feeding would be best for me. I figured it made sense to use the milk my body produced, that it would be a way to bond with my baby, that it was natural, mostly convenient, and, well, it was free! (What Mennonite girl doesn't love something that is free?!)

When my sweet girl Matilda was coming into this world we both needed some assistance and so she was delivered by emergency c-section. Afterwards we were taken to recovery, and within a very short time Matilda was given to me for her first official breast milk meal. She had a good, strong latch. I felt confident and natural. This continued over the next few days in the hospital. I recognized her cues and was able to provide for her. The nurses often would tell me that they were so happy that she was such a natural.

Well, we came home and things weren't so great! My colostrum was gone and it was time for the milk to take its place. I was nursing Matilda for an hour and then an hour later she was screaming again. She had to fall asleep nursing or she was up screaming. A lot of tears were shed by both Matilda and I.

My home care nurse came and it was confirmed that my milk had not come in, in full. My sweet girl was starving and needed food fast. The first time we gave her formula, she was gulping it down and afterward I had my sweet, content baby back.

Logically this should have been the point where I said, "ok, we will just use formula", however here is where I feel the struggle begin. Everything I read echoed in my head - BREAST IS BEST! I was also constantly hearing a voice in my head saying, "low milk supply is a myth" since I had heard that pretty much as often as I heard breast is best. At our prenatal classes our teacher told us that we just had to get through the first 7 days of breastfeeding and then everything would fall into a nice rhythm. But - I was struggling. I was losing my confidence and I was an emotional mess! One day at my parents place I couldn't stop crying, and even my sweet nephew said "why is auntie so sad??". I was thankful to have a few friends who also used formula - and who quickly replied to my email asking them to tell me why they chose to do formula and what their experience was with it.

I came to realize that a lot of people ask about how you feed your baby - and a lot of people will try and make you feel badly that you're feeding your baby formula. I'm not totally sure why people think that is ok - or that it's really any of their business! What every baby needs is love and attention - meaning a mom and dad and other family to meet their needs. A baby doesn't care if you feed them breast milk or formula - but they can tell if you are stressed and anxious in the process. Once we switched to formula, I was a happy mom, and I had a happy content baby. This doesn't mean that I think everyone should use formula, it just means that I'm a firm believer in people minding their own business, and just telling the mom that she is doing a great job caring for her baby! I was offered some suggestions of things I could do - groups I could go to, pills I could take, etc. etc. But the best advise I got was from my friend who told me PUT THAT BABY ON FORMULA AND GET YOUR SANITY BACK!! She could see that it wasn't about what baby needed, it was about how BFing was making me lose my mind. It was also so helpful to have family that just told me they supported me as a mom no matter what I chose.

So, 5 months later - I have decided to write this post about formula and about how it is working for us. My hope is that some other mom who is struggling will find this when she is doing a google search - and that she will see some hope in her situation - not just a bunch of websites and forums telling her that she is failing as a mom. You can be the best mom regardless of how you feed your baby. Loving your baby is most important - and loving your baby means giving them what they need - food and a sane mom :)

I realize this is already quite long, but I made a list of the PERKS of formula (as well as some of our "tips" to using formula) and I want to post my list. I will be clear again that this isn't me in any way saying formula is better than breastfeeding or vice versa. There is a long list of perks for breastfeeding and so this is in no way a comparison list - it is just something for the other formula moms out there to feel encouraged!!

- With formula you can share the responsibility of feeding - you can decide to just do it yourself, or to let your spouse take a turn, and even let other family members like grandparents and aunties help.
- You can do it anywhere without having to worry about covering up your body - which is mostly a perk for those people who would be uncomfortable nursing in public. I realize that isn't everyone, but it is definitely some people!
-You can leave baby with a babysitter and go on DATES! Or even just run errands and let baby stay in the comfort of home - plus it helps build relationship with baby and other family members since they get some time alone together!

- One-on-one daddy & baby time! Every morning Michael gets up with Matilda when she wakes up for the day. He feeds her, and she plays while he makes his lunch and drinks his coffee. He then puts her down for her first nap and leaves for work - all the while, I am still asleep! Since he is gone working for most of the day,  it is really awesome that they get to spend time together just the 2 of them, and on the mornings when he has to be up and gone before she is - she gives me this look, like "you aren't dad!" when I get up with her. They are very close and Michael is able to be a very hands-on dad!
- Formula takes longer to digest than breastmilk, which means baby sleeps longer stretches sooner, and also poops less! (on the downside, formula poop stinks - so that one diaper makes up for the 5-6 that breastfeeding babes have! - in my opinion!! haha)
- It is a solution for the emotionally exhausted mom who is trying to breast feed but doesn't make enough milk (or any!)

Here are tips that Michael and I think are worth sharing:
- pre-fill all your bottles with water at the start of the day - it makes it easier to make a bottle quickly if your baby gets as impatient as mine ;)
-refrigerate any left overs and use at the next feeding! (this was one of the best pieces of advise I received, since before that I would almost cry as I watched sometimes almost full bottles going down the drain with my money...) "Throwing it out" is just a recommendation by the company to sell more formula and thus make more money. You do however need to throw it out if you forgot to put it in the fridge between feedings.
- you don't HAVE TO make it in 60mL portions. We are currently filling our bottles with 150ml of water and 2 1/2 scoops of formula - they make the scoop rounded so you have less confidence about "eye-balling" it - but you figure out what half of the scoop is - a tiny bit more or less won't hurt baby.
- don't force baby to finish the bottle. Breastfeeding moms don't know how much (in volume) baby eats and that is ok! But when you have it in a bottle, you feel like you need to decide how much baby is eating, since one day she will guzzle a full bottle and the next time maybe only 60 ml! Baby knows when to stop. If I push Matti to finish her bottle - it comes back up eventually...
- before shaking the bottle, swirl it around - it helps the powder and water mix a bit - keeping it from bunching up in the nipple
- let Dad do feeds! He is just as capable as mom - sometimes he just needs a little encouragement at first to build confidence
- just because anyone CAN feed your baby doesn't mean you HAVE to let them. In some circumstances it may be best for mom (or dad) to do the feed - if that is your instinct - follow it! Baby will be thankful.
- just because you CAN feed anywhere (like in the middle of a noisy family gathering) doesn't mean you should. Baby gets so distracted and also it is a nice excuse to sneak away and spend some quiet time together
- Some formulas (like Nestle Good Start - which is what we use) - will make your babies poop a dark, army green, almost black color. People WILL ask you if your baby is ok. Poop can be any color - the most important thing is if it is a different color randomly - then that could be a problem, but because of the iron in formula, the poop is often quite dark.
- Don't feel like you have to buy the formula with more added things (like omega etc). The formula with added omega just causes constipation over here with my babe, they don't sell formula that will malnourish your baby, and if you are wondering about a formula - write down the ingredients (or bring in a tin) and show it to your pediatrician - they are there to answer your questions!
- Price does not determine if a formula is better or not! Sometimes it just has to do with brand name. Use whatever formula works for your baby - if it happens to be the cheapest one out there - lucky for you!!
- If a formula is working - DON'T SWITCH!! The ingredients are essentially the same, but even the slightest change can majorly affect baby. If you are worried about cost - try the cheapest one first! We started with Good Start and then tried to switch to a cheaper one, but she is used to good start, so the switch caused constipation, bad sleeping and a lot of crying.
- Just because one formula works for one mom doesn't mean it will work for you! (We made the switch because someone I know swore by this other formula - but like I said, it didn't work for us!)
- the liquid & concentrated formula is too expensive for daily use! But it is nice to have at the grandparents house if they want to keep formula on hand - it is a nice treat and the powder has to be used within 30 days of opening - which isn't much time if you just use it occasionally on visits!
- playtex vent-aire bottles changed our world - if baby seems to struggle at all during feeds - try a new bottle. We highly recommend them! (Matti switched to the fast flow nipples at 3 months. We never used the medium flow ones. Standard size is perfect for us. Wide is good if you are doing both breast and bottle.)
- don't offer bottle when baby is sleepy - they use it as a pacifier and then cry because formula is coming out - and if your baby is like Matilda - you will get a hearty dose of spit up afterward.

Most important:
- BE CONFIDENT in your choice to do formula and let other moms be confident in their choice of how they feed.
- The only thing that matters is that baby is fed & happy and that mom is sane :)

OK - long enough! Hopefully this will be helpful to someone - the advise of other formula moms was hugely helpful to me. So - to those moms (you know who you are!) THANK YOU. You helped me when I needed it most.

Here's to happy babies everywhere!

Life these days...

There has been so much going on these days!

We sold our house and we have to be out by April 26!! I have realize I am not good at packing - and I have never had to pack to live in transition. We will be starting to build our house soon - but it's not ready for us yet!!

My house is currently just rooms full of boxes and piles of things. There are sticky notes on my cupboards. I have endless lists. It's all a bit of a chaotic mess!

But things are still good around here because I have a sweet girl to keep me company!

Matilda is constantly growing and changing. She has the best personality! She laughs a lot and loves to chat. She is snugly after a nap or after I get home from being away from her.

She is exploring the world around her - biting on toys, swatting at everything.

She loves to sit in the bumbo and watch me in whatever I'm doing. She loves to stand in her exersaucer or just sit on a lap.

She has started using her jolly jumper and today she even realized she can sort of bounce around (so far she has just been standing in it). She really makes all of life better and if Mike and I aren't with her - we are talking about her!!

Other things are making us so thankful - the retreat house is done and it was a surreal and overwhelming moment for me when mom cut the ribbon - making it official!

I have started and deleted many a blog post these days. Getting caught up in wanting to hash out issues in my mind - only to realize that it wouldn't do me any good! I have been reminded of the importance of not being completely transparent on my blog. Not that things need to be hidden or dishonest - but that some things are meant to be shared only among a close circle of peers and confidants. Not the whole Internet world! So, instead, those of you who read this are just getting a little update from me! One day when I'm not packing or unpacking, I will try to write something thought provoking or "intelligent" but for now you just simply get to hear about life over here!

Chicken Pot Pie

For my birthday meal this year I chose waffles with my family and chicken pot pie with mikes family. Both meals were very tasty! For the chicken pot pie we used a recipe that I found a few months ago. It is so tasty and flavourful. The ultimate comfort food on a wintery day. So I figured I should share it!

Enjoy:
Chicken Pot Pie
Ingredients:
1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves – cubed
1 (16 ounce) bag frozen carrots and peas
1/2 cup sliced celery
1/3 cup butter
1/3 cup chopped onion
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon celery seed
32 oz. carton chicken broth for boiling(reserve 1 3/4 cups chicken broth for sauce)
2/3 cup milk
2 (9 inch) unbaked pie crusts (I use the refrigerated pilsbury crusts)

Slightly bake the bottom crust before filling the pie so it isn’t soggy. Just bake for 5-6 minutes at 425 degrees.
Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.
In a pot, combine the raw chicken, carrots, peas, and celery. Add the carton of chicken broth to cover and boil for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, drain (reserving 1 3/4 cup chicken broth for filling) and set aside.
In the saucepan over medium heat, cook onions in butter until soft and translucent. Stir in flour, salt, pepper, and celery seed. Slowly stir in chicken broth and milk. Simmer over medium-low heat until thick. Remove from heat and combine with the chicken, carrots, peas, and celery mixture. Here you can add more chicken broth if you like depending how runny you want your filling.
Place the chicken filling in bottom crust. Cover with top crust, seal edges, and cut away excess dough. Make several small slits in the top to allow steam to escape.
Bake in the preheated oven for 25 to 30 minutes, or until pastry is golden brown and filling is bubbly. Cool for 10 minutes before serving.

Source: http://www.the-girl-who-ate-everything.com/2009/07/chicken-pot-pie.html

4 months!

so i'm a week late with this, but my little babe is already 4 months old!! time flies

she is sweeter, funnier & more loved with each day.
we are so thankful!

(*you may notice that she has "shrunk" in height since last month - but its just due to my measuring last month vs the doctor measuring this month, guess i was a little generous with my tape measurer!!)

click on the picture to enlarge it so you can read what Matti is up to these days!!

Mom's Whipped Shortbread with a Chocolate Twist!!

The other day my mom had baked the most delicious cookies. Shortbread with chocolate chips. See the thing is - I don't normally like shortbread, but I couldn't stop eating them - they were that good!! So I asked for the recipe and tonight I made them... So good!

Try them for yourself!

Mom's Whipped Shortbread with a Chocolate Twist!!

3 cups flour
1/2 cup corn starch
1 cup icing sugar
1 lb. butter
vanilla

Cream butter with mixer. Add all dry ingredients gradually. Then add vanilla.
THen add chocolate chips - the amount is YOUR choice
Roll into balls, or scoop onto sheet with small scoop.
Flatten with your fingers.
Bake at 325 degrees for 15 minutes or till light brown.
Take off the sheet, let cool and enjoy!!

chinese chicken lettuce wraps

as some of you know, I made a recipe blog a couple of years ago. I've been quite neglectful of it - plus, sometimes I find it too complicated to go to multiple logins etc.

anyway - from now on, as I find good recipes I'll just post them on here!
If you want to check out any of my previous recipe postings - here is the link:
tocookandbakelikethat.blogspot.ca

I found this recipe last fall when I was making a meal to celebrate my Mom-in-law's last day of work. I had always really liked the lettuce wraps at Joeys Restaurant and wanted to find something similar. I was really pleased with how this recipe turned out, and have made it again since then. Lettuce wraps are so tasty because they are both hot and cold, delicious and crunchy. just so good.

So, here it is - enjoy!

Chinese Chicken Lettuce Wraps
(originally found on Food.com, changed and adapted by me!)
Original recipe says it serves 4-6, but I think those people must eat less than we do. I would say it serves 3.

Ingredients:
1 head iceberg lettuce
Rice Noodles (about half a pack - although you can add more to expand the meal)
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 chicken breasts, chopped into bite sized pieces
1 1/2 teaspoons garlic, minced
1 small onion, finely chopped
1 red pepper, finely chopped
1 can water chestnuts, slivered
1 cup carrots, sliced matchstick style (julienne)
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon brown sugar
5 tablespoons hoisin sauce
2 tablespoons sweet chili sauce (less if it is really spicy)
1 teaspoon coriander
1/4 cup peanuts, crushed or whole (your preference)

Directions:
1. Unwrap lettuce into "cups" and wash thoroughly.
2. Chop vegetables and chicken.
3. Cook rice noodles (I pour boiling water over them in a bowl and cover them until they are soft.)
4. While noodles are cooking - pour oil into a wok and saute the garlic for 30 seconds.
5. Add chicken, stir fry until no longer pink.
6. Add onions, pepper, water chestnuts and carrots. Fry for about a minute.
7. While waiting for the vegetables to saute, combine soy sauce and sugar. Mix with a spoon until the sugar is dissolved.
8. Add the soy sauce mixture to the pan, fry for about 2 minutes.
9. Add the hoisin and chili sauce. Stir well.
10. Add the coriander and peanuts (or leave the peanuts out and add them as you eat so that they stay crunchy).
11. Add the noodles and stir well.
12. Spoon into lettuce cups, roll the lettuce and enjoy!!

3 months

my sweet girl turned 3 months yesterday!

click on the picture to enlarge it - so you can read about what she is up to these days!!

she is pure sweetness.