it has been so long since i wrote on here
mostly because the "free" wireless we were using is no longer unsecured.. so our internet time has been cut down. and the other reason is probably just that there is so much going on (it seems) that i haven't had a second to just sit down and write.
i miss writing. sometimes i feel like i have so many thoughts in my head that i get dizzy and wonder why... mostly it's because i haven't had a chance to ramble on to michael, or in my journal, or on my blog. and my head just gets too full!
the last month has been good. full of family, and friends and Ev! I can't get enough of that little sweetie. even if i can't hold him because he needs time to sleep without being held, i am still just so happy to be in the same room as him and hear all his little noises. i just love him. sometimes michael and i will just be sitting in the car or on the couch not saying anything, and one of us will say "i just love everett so much!" and we laugh because we've both just been sitting there thinking about him. it is so wonderful to have a growing family and the love doesn't get less for anyone, but it just manages to increase for everyone. wonderful. bliss.
this month has also been full of trying to figure things out with our church family. without going into detail, we have been hurt and confused by a lot of leadership decisions in the past year and especially recently. i tried to speak my piece, but ended up feeling frustrated and like i wasn't heard fully but rather came across as complaining and not being willing to see the big picture. that is just really discouraging, and some sundays we have just chosen to stay home, or to go and be with family. it's hard to feel that way about church, mostly because for the first 23 years of my life church was just so normal, and something you went to on Sunday, with a very rare occasion that we wouldn't go. This last week we had agreed to pick up matt, so we went to church, and I was glad we did. it was nice to see a new team leading worship, and i hope they felt encouraged by responses!it has just made my mind hurt a little, and has made my heart really sad. especially seeing more hurt in people that michael and i really love and care about.
there are also more changes happening at work now... which only adds to the fullness of my mind!
i've certainly experienced many more emotions that i was unfamiliar with in 2009. i am hoping that 2010 will be a little more leveled out! heavier on the joy end of the emotion spectrum!
now let me just gush about everett for a few lines, and then i'll put up some pictures. and then i'll get back to my to-do list.
Everett.. what a handsome little man. i love that he looks so much like josh. i love how after he eats he spends time gazing at leah. i love being in their home and seeing a baby sleeping close by. i love that his cry is kind of husky, and that he squirms around as soon as he is cold. i love his little chin dimple, and that he gets it from my dad. i love seeing josh and leah walk around with him and talk to him, he is going to learn so much from them!
i love that he snuggles up like a little tree frog, and sits with his feet together like he's doing yoga. he has such cute little features, little lips, shoulders, long fingers and toes.. i am so excited to watch him grow up, to have him for his first sleepover, to play with him and teach him silly songs and games. i can't wait till we hear his little voice. but at the same time, i can, because i love him in this stage now too and don't want to rush him (he is already growing and changing so fast!) what a sweet little peanut.
No comments:
Post a Comment