Yesterday afternoon I officially had my LAST UNIVERSITY CLASS EVER!
I can hardly believe it.
I was even kind of sad about it as I drove away.
There is something wonderful about sitting in a classroom, learning and taking notes.
I won't miss assignments, and textbook readings.. midterms & exams though.
Nor will I miss the cost of tuition..
I can hardly believe that finally, 4 years after graduating "short" and feeling the discouragement of spending 4 years of full time school in something that now just overwhelmed me... 4 years later, I feel like I have redeemed that lost degree, and all the work that went into it, and on April 22nd I will have a diploma with my name on it!
I am going to walk across that graduating stage proudly, even if no one chose to come (although I know that I will have people there!). I did this for ME. And I'm proud of that.
People have been asking me lately what I will do now that I'm done my degree.. will I put it to use?
Well, not technically I suppose. Although I feel like a lot of what I learned in university can just be applied in life in general. But no, I will not be looking for a new job. I love my job! Running the ins & out of the church office that I work at is very fun for me. I love all the organization, and the fact that I get to order things from Staples on a regular basis (I am one of those people that loves school supply shopping.. even if I'm not going to school.. I always have to refrain from buying another pack of markers or pens, or even looseleaf! In a world that uses so much technology there is something so wonderfully simple about writing with pencil - non mechanical even - on looseleaf. Try it, it's simple bliss). I enjoy the staff that I work with, and I love the hours!
Plus, my DREAM is to one day have 2 jobs - one as a mom, and the other, working with my Mom at Women Refreshed at the Well. Plus by then I'll be living beside josh & leah. Could life get any better than that?!
So the simple answer is .. no. I won't be doing anything specific with my degree now that it's done. However, I will be celebrating the fact that I decided to just get over myself and go back to finish it.
One exam left (next Friday) and then I will be DONE.
how wonderful :)
honesty | insight | and iced coffee.
Showing posts with label school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label school. Show all posts
April 5, 2012
December 9, 2011
on the verge of an opera induced breakdown!
ok it's official
i'm on the verge of a school induced stress meltdown
today i feel like I could cry about anything and everything!
tomorrow is the dreaded exam and I just have not put as much work and time into it as I should
I find it very hard to pour hours & hours into something that really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, BUT, I also want to do well.
right now I'm feeling overwhelmed at the fact that I will be up till the wee hours tonight studying, and then again in the morning. Michael is driving me to my exam so that I can keep studying in the car on the way there, and also so we can go on a date afterward
tomorrow evening I will be school free (until January!)
I will be attempting to appeal the music course that I'm signed up for next semester, and if that goes my way.. I will only have 1 biology course left (I have never been so excited about biology in my life. mainly due to the fact that it's not a music history course)
I don't think I'd be as stressed if my exam didn't require me being able to know:
45 songs (he plays a 30 second clip and then you have to know the name, composer, year, genre & 4 musical things about it)
129 terms & composers (you need to know 4 things about each)
and then an essay (8 potential topics, 4 will be on the exam & you have to write 1) the essay requires 25 points, however, if you don't mention something that he would have.. you won't get full marks, so it also requires some slight mind reading skills.
ah. and he hasn't given our marks back for our presentations or papers... so I really have no clue where I'm at (so far I know that I have 22.5% out of a potential 30 (from past tests)...
i'm looking forward to next week. to reading for fun. to cleaning my house. to spending time with michael that doesn't include my notes & text books. to finishing christmas shopping & prep. to blogging & catching up on friends blogs. to being at starbucks & mountain bean for fun & not for memorizing facts. to relaxing!
right now this is life at our house:
i'm on the verge of a school induced stress meltdown
today i feel like I could cry about anything and everything!
tomorrow is the dreaded exam and I just have not put as much work and time into it as I should
I find it very hard to pour hours & hours into something that really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, BUT, I also want to do well.
right now I'm feeling overwhelmed at the fact that I will be up till the wee hours tonight studying, and then again in the morning. Michael is driving me to my exam so that I can keep studying in the car on the way there, and also so we can go on a date afterward
tomorrow evening I will be school free (until January!)
I will be attempting to appeal the music course that I'm signed up for next semester, and if that goes my way.. I will only have 1 biology course left (I have never been so excited about biology in my life. mainly due to the fact that it's not a music history course)
I don't think I'd be as stressed if my exam didn't require me being able to know:
45 songs (he plays a 30 second clip and then you have to know the name, composer, year, genre & 4 musical things about it)
129 terms & composers (you need to know 4 things about each)
and then an essay (8 potential topics, 4 will be on the exam & you have to write 1) the essay requires 25 points, however, if you don't mention something that he would have.. you won't get full marks, so it also requires some slight mind reading skills.
ah. and he hasn't given our marks back for our presentations or papers... so I really have no clue where I'm at (so far I know that I have 22.5% out of a potential 30 (from past tests)...
i'm looking forward to next week. to reading for fun. to cleaning my house. to spending time with michael that doesn't include my notes & text books. to finishing christmas shopping & prep. to blogging & catching up on friends blogs. to being at starbucks & mountain bean for fun & not for memorizing facts. to relaxing!
right now this is life at our house:
my cat supervises my studying. i know I've successfully studied for hours when he comes & lays directly on my notes. he does not appreciate being neglected!
multiple blankets. heating pads. lap tables. and notes. everywhere.
I have 27 1/2 hours until I write the exam. so.. in less than 30 hours I will be back to normal. I suppose I can handle that...
December 1, 2011
christmas & school don't mix
monday is my last day of classes - and on that day I have a major paper due in one class (topic still to be chosen.. been having a hard time, even though the topic is "anything relating to 19th century music" I am not a fan of such broad topics) - 3 smaller papers (1-2 pagers) in the other class, and a "quiz" (in my bible class we don't have an exam during the regular exam time. just a shorter quiz)
so the end is near, but it's getting worse before it's getting better. this weekend will be filled with research, paper writing and studying.
but it's the christmas season! and I feel like I'm being gypped of the start of it. thankfully my friend Audrey & I had our "christmas launch party" last night - which consisted of starbucks christmas drinks, peppermint middles oreo cookies, listening to stille nacht (ok that was by chance in starbucks, but still - check!), chatting, crocheting (on my part) and watching The Holiday. I also wore my "festive sweater" to make it complete.
I feel a bit like the picture up top. about to step into the christmas spirit, but then I just want to put everything else (aka school) on the shelf so I can spend time with family and friends, going to plays and dinners, singing carols, making gingerbread and celebrating Jesus's birth. But the more I avoid my school to-do list.. the more stressed I am, and that is not what I want this season to be about!
only a few more days..
in the meantime, I will get even more into the holiday spirit by listening to christmas music constantly. my favorite cd so far this year is...
(Vocals, piano & ukele by Zooey Deschanel, Vocals, Guitar & Organs by M. Ward)
November 10, 2011
food for thought.
i have been thinking a lot lately about how we approach, read & "accept" the bible
do we take it at face value?
do we interpret it?
do we pick & choose what to believe?
do we pick & choose what is "literal" and what is "symbolic" or a "suggestion"?
I am taking a course at CMU this semester called "The Problem of Evil in a Biblical Perspective" but really it should be called, the "class of questions, debates and opinions" and that is both a good thing and a frustrating thing. I realize that it is quite hard to definite terms like "evil" because it can be quite subjective, also, some things don't seem "evil" when compared to something else that is much worse. Also, there are so many different circumstances, situations and opinions to consider. For me, what ever is not from God is evil. God created EVERYTHING. but sin.. that is not God. But then we run into the question, well, what defines SIN. it is strange how something can be so simple yet so complicated.
I think it is good to learn things, and to have debates and to experience things that challenge your faith. it helps make it stronger and helps me to really figure out exactly what I believe. But, at the same time, I really struggle when having conversations with other Christians, who take the bible to mean something totally different than I do. For example, I realized this week (in more than one situation) that people believe that Genesis is a myth. a nice story, but not truth. and not only that, but some people also think that Job is a myth and that Jonah is a myth. what? that just doesn't sit right with me.
genesis starts with "in the beginning" it doesn't start with "heres a nice story" or "once upon a time". This is God's word, and if we can pick and choose which books of the bible are "true" and which are "myths", then what makes us think that any of it is true?
my teacher explained in class that in some ways, Genesis is a "myth" (to which my jaw dropped open and I was already mentally preparing my email to the advisory board at the school..) but then he went on. In a "literary" way, yes, Genesis is a myth. Because a "myth" used to mean a story that was used to make a point, as in, the point was God created everything, but Genesis doesn't include a detailed time line (for instance, how long was adam in the garden before he actually met Eve? how long did it take him to name all the animals? how many years passed before A & E ate the apple? where did the other people come from - cain's wife - etc.) the details aren't the important part. so yes, in a literary term, Genesis can fall under the category of myth. But, now a days, myth is used for "mythology" or stories, or untrue fables. and some people are lumping that together with how they view Genesis. I just really struggle with all of that from other Christians. We are reading the same book, we are serving the same God... how do we come to such a different conclusion?
I also had a conversation with a girl named Kat this week.. and she & I began talking about Genesis (through no prompting of my own.. seems like God has just been bringing it all up in different conversations around me) and she made a point that I had never thought about before. In genesis it says that God took Adam and placed him in the garden, to work in it and care for it. But, "working" in that sense was not the same as the way we "work" now (one of the differences since the fall). Kat pointed out to me that Adam was in charge of tending to this place of meeting, this holy sanctuary so to speak. Adam was in charge of caring for it, because that is where God came and met with him. Not only met with him, but WALKED with him through the garden. God put Adam there to care for their meeting place, their hang out. how cool, that Adam has such an intimate relationship with God - they just hung out together! I love it. And, through my own experience of relationship with God.. and how real it is, it makes it even harder for me to believe that God "made up" those intimate relationships with Adam and Job.
Food for thought I suppose...
do we take it at face value?
do we interpret it?
do we pick & choose what to believe?
do we pick & choose what is "literal" and what is "symbolic" or a "suggestion"?
I am taking a course at CMU this semester called "The Problem of Evil in a Biblical Perspective" but really it should be called, the "class of questions, debates and opinions" and that is both a good thing and a frustrating thing. I realize that it is quite hard to definite terms like "evil" because it can be quite subjective, also, some things don't seem "evil" when compared to something else that is much worse. Also, there are so many different circumstances, situations and opinions to consider. For me, what ever is not from God is evil. God created EVERYTHING. but sin.. that is not God. But then we run into the question, well, what defines SIN. it is strange how something can be so simple yet so complicated.
I think it is good to learn things, and to have debates and to experience things that challenge your faith. it helps make it stronger and helps me to really figure out exactly what I believe. But, at the same time, I really struggle when having conversations with other Christians, who take the bible to mean something totally different than I do. For example, I realized this week (in more than one situation) that people believe that Genesis is a myth. a nice story, but not truth. and not only that, but some people also think that Job is a myth and that Jonah is a myth. what? that just doesn't sit right with me.
genesis starts with "in the beginning" it doesn't start with "heres a nice story" or "once upon a time". This is God's word, and if we can pick and choose which books of the bible are "true" and which are "myths", then what makes us think that any of it is true?
my teacher explained in class that in some ways, Genesis is a "myth" (to which my jaw dropped open and I was already mentally preparing my email to the advisory board at the school..) but then he went on. In a "literary" way, yes, Genesis is a myth. Because a "myth" used to mean a story that was used to make a point, as in, the point was God created everything, but Genesis doesn't include a detailed time line (for instance, how long was adam in the garden before he actually met Eve? how long did it take him to name all the animals? how many years passed before A & E ate the apple? where did the other people come from - cain's wife - etc.) the details aren't the important part. so yes, in a literary term, Genesis can fall under the category of myth. But, now a days, myth is used for "mythology" or stories, or untrue fables. and some people are lumping that together with how they view Genesis. I just really struggle with all of that from other Christians. We are reading the same book, we are serving the same God... how do we come to such a different conclusion?
I also had a conversation with a girl named Kat this week.. and she & I began talking about Genesis (through no prompting of my own.. seems like God has just been bringing it all up in different conversations around me) and she made a point that I had never thought about before. In genesis it says that God took Adam and placed him in the garden, to work in it and care for it. But, "working" in that sense was not the same as the way we "work" now (one of the differences since the fall). Kat pointed out to me that Adam was in charge of tending to this place of meeting, this holy sanctuary so to speak. Adam was in charge of caring for it, because that is where God came and met with him. Not only met with him, but WALKED with him through the garden. God put Adam there to care for their meeting place, their hang out. how cool, that Adam has such an intimate relationship with God - they just hung out together! I love it. And, through my own experience of relationship with God.. and how real it is, it makes it even harder for me to believe that God "made up" those intimate relationships with Adam and Job.
Food for thought I suppose...
November 8, 2011
birthdays, updates and stampin'
again i will start my post by saying, it has been so long since i have written on here
i didn't even write about my hubby's birthday, or about how much i love him.. which i do, like crazy!
birthday weekend recap:
supper at old spaghetti factory with moi, where i asked the waitress what they do for birthdays and she said they'd sing, then she brought out his dessert with no fan fare.. i asked her if they were still planning on doing it... but she totally forgot. ah well. i sang to him instead.
saturday was waffle breakfast with my family,
sunday morning we had a chance to babysit ev while josh & leah went to church since his cold isn't needing to be shared with all the other kids in the nursery, and it was so awesome because the whole time ev just wanted to soak up time with 'uncle', mike played these drums for him so he could dance around (we were having a jam session, mike on drums, me on tambourine & ev on ukelele. we eventually had to end the jam sesh cuz ev got excited and did a rock & roll guitar toss...), Everett then wanted to be 'cozy' with uncle and have uncle read him book after book after book. it was such a perfect gift for michael to be able to spend so much one-on-one time with Everett. then a fun afternoon of nachos, mustaches and tv shows with josh, leah, andrew & rach
Sunday evening was supper & dessert with mike's family, and then our weekend of celebrating was over. i did however leave up the birthday streamers that I had draped all over our kitchen, so it still feels a bit like a party in our kitchen.
now the week is in full swing. i'm going to attempt to get friday off, it would be nice to have a full day at home. i miss my day off now that it is filled up with classes.
it is hard to not over commit to life, relationships & things.. especially when they are all good things. i have had to be a bit more protective over my time and that has made me feel like i come across as selfish, but i am now completely off of my medication and needing to find other ways to keep my life and emotions on a more even level. i did however, just sign up for one more thing - but, i think it is ok
i have decided to join a "stamp club" for 10 months. sounds a little nerdy maybe, not sure. also, i really think it's not totally my personality to do this completely on my own with 10 strangers. i asked a friend to join me, but she didn't accept my invite, so i'm doing this solo. it is 2 hours (7-9) one tuesday out of the month for 10 months. we get together and make cards according to the demonstration of the person leading the group (her name is kristyne, and we'll meet in her house) there is no cost, except that we each commit to spending $25 per month on product from the stampin up line. also, kristyne calls one of us the "hostess" each month so that we can get the perks of free stuff that comes with hosting on a $250+ sale of product. we also have to provide a small snack the night that we "host". i am really excited to learn some new things and also just have a relaxing 2 hours of doing crafts. i am nervous about the fact that i know none of these people (not even kristyne) but i think it also shows that i'm in a more confident space to be brave enough to just go for it. We are allowed to bring friends, and the friend just pays a $10 drop in fee to make the cards that night, so if anyone ever wants to join me, please do, i'd love it. our first meeting is november 22nd.
school is coming closer to the end of the semester. it feels like it's been going on forever. i am happy with my overall choice to finish my degree, but i am finding it a much bigger challenge than i expected. i am doing well in both classes, but i am tired and so ready to be done. I'm getting my grad pictures taken on monday! i am still loving my bible class, but there are a few people in that class that make my head hurt with all of their opinions and claims about the bible, so i'm trying to figure all of that out. for me, the most important thing is JESUS and my relationship with him. the rest of the details.. don't need to be all completely figured out in my rationalizing brain. but more on that another day.
i didn't even write about my hubby's birthday, or about how much i love him.. which i do, like crazy!
birthday weekend recap:
supper at old spaghetti factory with moi, where i asked the waitress what they do for birthdays and she said they'd sing, then she brought out his dessert with no fan fare.. i asked her if they were still planning on doing it... but she totally forgot. ah well. i sang to him instead.
saturday was waffle breakfast with my family,
sunday morning we had a chance to babysit ev while josh & leah went to church since his cold isn't needing to be shared with all the other kids in the nursery, and it was so awesome because the whole time ev just wanted to soak up time with 'uncle', mike played these drums for him so he could dance around (we were having a jam session, mike on drums, me on tambourine & ev on ukelele. we eventually had to end the jam sesh cuz ev got excited and did a rock & roll guitar toss...), Everett then wanted to be 'cozy' with uncle and have uncle read him book after book after book. it was such a perfect gift for michael to be able to spend so much one-on-one time with Everett. then a fun afternoon of nachos, mustaches and tv shows with josh, leah, andrew & rach
Sunday evening was supper & dessert with mike's family, and then our weekend of celebrating was over. i did however leave up the birthday streamers that I had draped all over our kitchen, so it still feels a bit like a party in our kitchen.
now the week is in full swing. i'm going to attempt to get friday off, it would be nice to have a full day at home. i miss my day off now that it is filled up with classes.
it is hard to not over commit to life, relationships & things.. especially when they are all good things. i have had to be a bit more protective over my time and that has made me feel like i come across as selfish, but i am now completely off of my medication and needing to find other ways to keep my life and emotions on a more even level. i did however, just sign up for one more thing - but, i think it is ok
i have decided to join a "stamp club" for 10 months. sounds a little nerdy maybe, not sure. also, i really think it's not totally my personality to do this completely on my own with 10 strangers. i asked a friend to join me, but she didn't accept my invite, so i'm doing this solo. it is 2 hours (7-9) one tuesday out of the month for 10 months. we get together and make cards according to the demonstration of the person leading the group (her name is kristyne, and we'll meet in her house) there is no cost, except that we each commit to spending $25 per month on product from the stampin up line. also, kristyne calls one of us the "hostess" each month so that we can get the perks of free stuff that comes with hosting on a $250+ sale of product. we also have to provide a small snack the night that we "host". i am really excited to learn some new things and also just have a relaxing 2 hours of doing crafts. i am nervous about the fact that i know none of these people (not even kristyne) but i think it also shows that i'm in a more confident space to be brave enough to just go for it. We are allowed to bring friends, and the friend just pays a $10 drop in fee to make the cards that night, so if anyone ever wants to join me, please do, i'd love it. our first meeting is november 22nd.
school is coming closer to the end of the semester. it feels like it's been going on forever. i am happy with my overall choice to finish my degree, but i am finding it a much bigger challenge than i expected. i am doing well in both classes, but i am tired and so ready to be done. I'm getting my grad pictures taken on monday! i am still loving my bible class, but there are a few people in that class that make my head hurt with all of their opinions and claims about the bible, so i'm trying to figure all of that out. for me, the most important thing is JESUS and my relationship with him. the rest of the details.. don't need to be all completely figured out in my rationalizing brain. but more on that another day.
October 23, 2011
music brain
i have music on the brain
and my brain is tired!
with michael away all weekend I tried to fill up all of my time studying
i have my dreaded music history (studies in 19th century music) midterm tomorrow
my prof is a musical genius. he knows everything there is to know about music history, and i genuinely think that every day that he gets to teach, his head pops off his pillow with excitement that he gets to share his love of music with another sleepy eyed class. that's probably what gives him the energy to bike to school on the coldest days (and he bikes in jeans, a dress shirt and a blazer. the best!)
sadly, my head does not pop off the pillow with the same enthusiasm
i'm probably the one "music student" that strongly dislikes the study of music
but i want to finish my degree, and 2 music history courses are standing in my way, so i've chosen to just take them, head on. but i'm just tired.
we finally convinced my prof to give us a list of terms & composers to learn for the test. his first answer was "but then you will only learn those terms. i want you to know the whole text book!" hmm not going to happen! Instead he gave us about 40 terms/composers and 19 songs to learn as well. we have a listening portion as part of the test, he plays a 30 second clip and you have to identify the title, composer, year, genre & 4 characteristics of the piece. more than one of the 19 pieces we have to know is over an hour long... it's been a long weekend!
in just over 12 hours I will be writing the exam, and I will be so glad when it is over. i want to do well, but right now i'm frazzled. i have been having to take breaks, or else my eyes just glaze over my cue cards. right now i'm typing as i listen to one of the hour long pieces.
my plan is to try and be in bed around 10:30, wake up around 6, get a big starbucks americano, drive to the school, and glaze over my cue cards right up until the minute my prof says we can start writing. i'm a crammer all the way :)
hope everyone else's weekend has been more fun.
with michael away all weekend I tried to fill up all of my time studying
i have my dreaded music history (studies in 19th century music) midterm tomorrow
my prof is a musical genius. he knows everything there is to know about music history, and i genuinely think that every day that he gets to teach, his head pops off his pillow with excitement that he gets to share his love of music with another sleepy eyed class. that's probably what gives him the energy to bike to school on the coldest days (and he bikes in jeans, a dress shirt and a blazer. the best!)
sadly, my head does not pop off the pillow with the same enthusiasm
i'm probably the one "music student" that strongly dislikes the study of music
but i want to finish my degree, and 2 music history courses are standing in my way, so i've chosen to just take them, head on. but i'm just tired.
we finally convinced my prof to give us a list of terms & composers to learn for the test. his first answer was "but then you will only learn those terms. i want you to know the whole text book!" hmm not going to happen! Instead he gave us about 40 terms/composers and 19 songs to learn as well. we have a listening portion as part of the test, he plays a 30 second clip and you have to identify the title, composer, year, genre & 4 characteristics of the piece. more than one of the 19 pieces we have to know is over an hour long... it's been a long weekend!
my plan is to try and be in bed around 10:30, wake up around 6, get a big starbucks americano, drive to the school, and glaze over my cue cards right up until the minute my prof says we can start writing. i'm a crammer all the way :)
 |
| cue cards and coffee. necessities for music students. |
September 12, 2011
back to school...
back to school
back to school
to prove to dad that i'm not a fool
i got my lunch packed up
got my boots tied tight
hope i don't get in a fight
back to school
back to school
back to school...
the song from billy madison is playing in my head as i sit here in the computer lab at school (and for the record, i'm not at school to prove to my dad that i'm not a fool! he knows I'm the smartest girl around :) )
here i am, back at school
it was interesting to me this morning, as i sat through my first class that i feel so new but i'm really not
i'm going to graduate approximately 3 years sooner than the people in my classes
but they all knew each other, much like when i was a music major at cmu a few years ago, we went through all of our classes together
it's also interesting to me how, typically, music students fit into the stereotype.. and i had to laugh to myself as they were all laughing over "music jokes" (and i really do mean MUSIC jokes. jokes about certain notes and keys in music..) a lot of the technical stuff goes over my head, and a lot of the stuff that the teacher described as "basic info that you all likely know already" was stuff that i was jotting down frantically. 8 pages of notes later, i sure don't feel like a musical genious! ha ha!
oh well, i am still happy to be here
with my new notebooks
my new (expensive) text books
my mug of hot coffee
and the knowledge in my head that in 8 months i will be graduating!
back to school...
time to get some lunch, then on to my second class. plus, i have to go pick up the books i just reserved at the library for my first presentation! guess i may as well just dive in completely
hope you are all having a good monday morning!
back to school
to prove to dad that i'm not a fool
i got my lunch packed up
got my boots tied tight
hope i don't get in a fight
back to school
back to school
back to school...
the song from billy madison is playing in my head as i sit here in the computer lab at school (and for the record, i'm not at school to prove to my dad that i'm not a fool! he knows I'm the smartest girl around :) )
here i am, back at school
it was interesting to me this morning, as i sat through my first class that i feel so new but i'm really not
i'm going to graduate approximately 3 years sooner than the people in my classes
but they all knew each other, much like when i was a music major at cmu a few years ago, we went through all of our classes together
it's also interesting to me how, typically, music students fit into the stereotype.. and i had to laugh to myself as they were all laughing over "music jokes" (and i really do mean MUSIC jokes. jokes about certain notes and keys in music..) a lot of the technical stuff goes over my head, and a lot of the stuff that the teacher described as "basic info that you all likely know already" was stuff that i was jotting down frantically. 8 pages of notes later, i sure don't feel like a musical genious! ha ha!
oh well, i am still happy to be here
with my new notebooks
my new (expensive) text books
my mug of hot coffee
and the knowledge in my head that in 8 months i will be graduating!
back to school...
time to get some lunch, then on to my second class. plus, i have to go pick up the books i just reserved at the library for my first presentation! guess i may as well just dive in completely
hope you are all having a good monday morning!
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